I took my laptop to the hospital. I don’t really know what I was thinking. When I’d packed it in my tote bag, I figured there’d be lots of sitting and waiting—and there was. But did I really think I’d do anything but stand next to my son’s hospital bed? Because that’s what I did…
Suffering
God Plans Your Stops
Everything was ready. The suitcases, the extra pillows, the hotel reservations, my traveling pharmacy of carefully stocked children’s Motrin and Tylenol, the snacks, the grandma traveling in to keep our younger son, the plan to check into the hospital at 5:15 a.m. Everything was ready for our return, too—the shower chair, the bed rail, the…
Remember
The other night, I curled up with a book in what my kids call “Mom’s Corner” of the couch. We bought our gray sectional last year because of that corner. Well, technically we bought it because our fifteen-year-old sofa was just about to fall apart. But, I sat in the corner of the floor display…
Joy in the Morning
I think about joy in the middle of the night sometimes. I remember when I was memorizing the book of James a couple of years ago, and I got really hung up on that verse in the first chapter, “Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds” because it seems…
He’s Already There
My friend sat next to me in my living room. I still had the pink and teal couch back then, a confection of polyester and silver thread I’d inherited that was exactly as garish and horrifying as it sounds. I put it on the curb in front of my house last summer because I’d finally…
Ordinary Sunday
“Church today,” I wrote in my journal early Sunday morning. “I could really use the fellowship. I’m feeling low.” I put down my pen. I hadn’t slept much. It was a relief to know I’d soon be among my church family, distracted from the interior concerns running through my mind. Better than distracted, I knew…
The Manna is Always There
I have a plastic bin filled with beans hidden in my basement. I packed that bin two years ago when I, like everyone else, worried about food supplies. I’ve borrowed from the bin a little, but if you need rice or dried beans, I’ve got you covered. I also have gallons of water in case…
There Will Be No Burden-Bearing if There Is No Burden-Sharing
I was having trouble walking that Saturday morning. Exhausted, fatigued, and discouraged, I had told my husband I couldn’t participate in the church leaf-raking service project we were doing for our widows and shut-ins. I felt embarrassed when my family left the house clad in boots and gloves and armed with rakes and leaf-blowers to…
What We Pray in the Dark
It was 1:30 a.m. Pain seared through my lower back, wrapping itself around my S. I. joints and radiating into the deepest part of my hips. I moved from bed to couch and back, rearranging the pillows a dozen times, applying ice and heat wherever I could. There was no relief. None. Tears dripped down…
Sometimes I Need a Sunrise
Every morning this week, I’ve watched the sun rise. Every morning, without fail, the sun persistently pushes down the dark of night, lower and lower, into the horizon until I can’t see anything but light. It happens so slowly that you can’t tell it’s happening at all. Were you to try to decide which moment…